Happy turkey day to all of you who celebrate! I spent mine with family in Loreto, Mexico.
You may have seen me talk about my parents on Twitter now and then. They live on a wooden sail boat called a tyanna and they circle the Sea of Cortez (that’s between Mexico and Baja) throughout the year, following the season change.
This time of year, they start heading south, chasing the heat. Last year they berthed the boat and flew back to the states for Christmas and New Years. This year, they flew myself, Mr. V, my younger brother, and his girlfriend all down to them where we spent a week in a hotel on the beach snorkling in clear, warm waters.
It was both amazing and anxiety inducing. The snorkeling off Loreto’s coast is stunning, but they have spotty wifi at best and my workaholic self couldn’t check in with coworkers or email the entire time.
So I highly recommend it if you ever have a chance to get away and need to unplug.
In my last update I mentioned my depression drugs were no longer working. I’m happy to report that the day before vacation, I visited my doctor and was given an increased prescription. I’ve been bumped up from 60mg to 90mg of Cymbalta daily and I started the new pills that same day.
Generally, a med (or dosage) change causes a week or two of side effects, but I was spending every single day in the sun, running around Loreto, and enjoying some truly amazing food to notice anything else.
Now that I’m back home I can tell the drugs are really, really working. I’ve told my friends that I feel like superman. Monday (the day after vacation) I cleaned the whole house, went through the whole garden, and was social in the evening. Yesterday I made a roast in the crocpot. I haven’t been able to cook us a meal in over a year. Today I’m back at the café for my usual workday and we’re supposed to play DnD tonight.
All of that in such a short span of time would have been unthinkable two weeks ago. I feel so much better I’m not sure I can properly measure it.
However, I do remember this boosted effect happening the last time I got a dosage increase so I’m on the alert. The moment it seems to be fading or I have bout of exhaustion I’ll be calling up my doctor again. I already have a follow-up scheduled for mid December.
My depression really sneaks up on me slowly. It’s hard to see coming and easy to rationalize the symptoms away without noticing. When I’m inside that space it’s almost impossible to see how bad it is because I can’t compare it to yesterday. Yesterday was pretty much the same, right? This is just an off day. Tomorrow will be better. And then there are just enough good days to convince me something might be wrong, but it’s probably just something, something, ignore it. Setting an issue aside ’for later’ is another symptom of mine.
You can see how this cycle doesn’t lend itself well to correction.
Of course, it’s easy to see all this now that I’m on a new-dose high, so I’m going to be tracking my symptoms in my bullet journal going forward in an attempt to self-assess more objectively weather the drugs are still working.
It’s really great to be back, both from Loreto and that foggy place that depression puts me, and I’m looking forward to working. 😉